Proud Vs. Honored

Occasionally a word will shift meaning, occasionally culture will change the way it talks about something and move to a new word with a new meaning. In America we have reached a very interesting moment, have we moved away from Honored and many use Proud in its place. This forces us to answer the question “Is this because we have moved the meaning of proud so it is synonymous with honored, or have we adopted a new word with the new meaning?”

I think the place to start is the definitions:

Proud: feeling deep pleasure or satisfaction as a result of one’s own achievements, qualities, or possessions or those of someone with whom one is closely associated.

Honored: regard with great respect.

I suspect we tried to change the word “Honored” to look more like “Proud”, and failed, so we adopted a new word. The reason I say this is pretty simple. The modern zeitgeist says the definition of Proud is culturally acceptable, while Honored is viewed as something someone with low self esteem would say. Our culture doesn’t value “I am honored to have been part of this project” instead it accepts and celebrates, “I am proud of the work I (or less often, “we”) did.” When someone says “I am honored to have been part of this project/team” it is increasingly common for people to think a project ended in failure.

Today I saw someone talking about an award they won saying: “I am proud of being the first … to be named to the … week Hall of fame.” The reality is that award was won because of a team, proud is the wrong word. They were nominated, and it was awarded to them. It is not their achievement. I increasingly hear high school and college graduates saying “I am proud of this accomplishment”, and there is something wrong with this. “I am honored to have completed my college or high school education” shows respect for all the people involved in that journey. Graduation is their accomplishment, but it is not something that was done on their own accord.

Pride has always been a vice, and this is not a positive sign in our culture. I don’t tell my kids I am proud of them. I tell them I am honored and thankful when their behavior merits it. Pride remains a vice.